My husband is an EXTERNAL PROCESSOR. Capital E, capital X, capital TERNAL PROCESSOR!
I am a WORRY-WART. Capital W, capital O, capital RRY-WART!
Whoow! Feels good to dump that out!
I grew up in a town of 300ish people. I was so afraid of being kid-napped that I wouldn't even walk from our house to our garage (maybe 50 feet) by myself after dark. My parents might have gone a little overboard on stranger danger with me. I also have an over-active imagination...and for some reason have never 'day-dreamed/fantasized' about good and lovely things happening, but instead imagine and live out the worst of the worst in my head.
Mustang has no filter, he says what is on his mind (oh boy does he!). He needs to wrap his head around situations. He needs to tell people about what he's dealing with - the good, the bad and the frustrating. He needs to vent...to me. He needs loving input...from me. He needs validation...from me. He needs ME to listen and to hear him.
Did I mention that I'm a worry-wart (capital W and all that jazz)? I have yet to learn how to be there for my husband and support him and hear him and love him through the bad and the frustrating without becoming paralyzed by my worry.
So where is the balance? I have NO IDEA. And that's okay for me right now. I'm looking towards 2012 as a time of less worry, more supporting and in general a year of hope and faith. The church I go to just did a sermon on hope and, as I was reminded last night, it was AMAZING!
I am so little in God's grand plan and I want to make it so that He can use ME, use MUSTANG, use BUTTERCUP in HIS STORY. There is no reason to worry when you know you are under His Grace. But those are easy words to write and HARD words to live out. My prayer for 2012 is that I grow in this area...that I grow BIG in this area.
Much Love,
~The Woman With 4 First Names
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